The mixture of science and love is familiar to most of us, as we commonly refer to physical attraction as “having chemistry."
Now, science is putting the concept of falling in love to the test. Professor Robert Epstein from the University of California, San Diego, engaged his student in an experiment to see if people can create feelings of love through learned skills. The conclusions of this study tell us whether or not falling in love is more than just a matter of chance.
The students experiment with soul gazing. Professor Epstien paired students up that were unfamiliar with each other, and he asked them to rate their feelings for their partner. Then, he asked them to stare deeply into their partner’s eyes for two minutes. Afterwards, the students were asked to rate their feelings once again. The results indicated a modest increase in feelings of love (7%), a significant increase in how much they liked each other (11%), and a huge increase in feelings of closeness (45%). Professor Epstien uncovers the reason behind the students’ positive responses to mutual gazing. “They are being vulnerable to each other, and that is the key element in emotional bonding,” he explains.
Ready to experiment with your relationship? Here are a few love-enhancing exercises to try out on your romantic relationship, or even someone to which you would like to feel closer.
Breath as One. Embrace your partner and try to match your breathing with his or hers. After a few minutes you will feel absorbed in each other’s embrace.
Monkey Love. Sit on the floor together about 2 feet apart, facing each other. Begin moving your hands, feet, and or legs in a way that perfectly mimics your partner. This exercise is challenging and really fun, and it also allows you to feel connected to your partner.
Secret Swap. Exchange deep, dark secrets with your partner. Write them on small pieces of paper and swap them, one at a time. You can exchange a few or many.
There’s method to his madness. Professor Epstein explains that, “over the years, having looked carefully at the fast-growing scientific literature on relationship science and having conducted some new research of my own, I have come to believe that there is a definite fix for our poor performance in romantic relationships. The fix is to extract a practical technology from the research and then to teach people how to use it.”
To read Professor Epstein's full article, follow this link: How Science Can Help you Fall in Love.
Source: Epstien, Robert. How Science can Help you Fall in Love. Scientific American Mind. ScientificAmerican.com/mind. January/February 2010.
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